DIY plumbing

Our upstairs tub faucet suddenly broke yesterday. It would be less annoying if it weren't on the heels of the shit-thick plumbing problem of last week.

Just let me say here, my husband and I are not handy people. When the new neighbors moved in and immediately built, by hand, the Taj Mahal of backyard playsets, we drank beer and mocked their efforts in snarky voices, all while coveting even an iota of that kind of construction know-how. If we are ever forced to construct, fix or sell things as a means of earning money, I'm pretty sure we would quickly spiral into homelessness.

So when the Home Depot how-to guide said a professional can fix a faucet in 15 minutes, a novice in 30 and a beginner in 45, it's speaks to our talents that it took a full evening, not to mention the day we spent without water waiting for evening to arrive.

Just five beers, two episodes of Top Chef and 13 hours to fix one bathtub faucet. And yes, that is a hairdryer helping deconstruct the faucet in the provide photo. At least the bathtub isn't filled with water.

Poop in the public pool

I would normally say that's all that needs to be said about that, but today "poop in the public pool" has an extra special meaning.

That's because our plumbing in on the fritz, so for a large part of the afternoon I tried really hard not to vomit while cleaning mysterious bits of this-and-that from the basement floor. Because throwing up would require a working toilet. And that's something I just didn't have.

Also, I would like to pose this question – is it The Worst to resume swimming after they discovered the poop with some doubt as to whether they really got it all, or to be swimming in said pool as the announcement is being made? Or maybe The Worst is the job of swimming 12 feet under water with a net to fish the poop from the pool.

Hmmm. Yeah... That's definitely the worst.